For all those of you with popup blockers, here’s a quiz I lost track of a while back, recovered by way of Pupgrrl.

What firearm are you?

#1 FN P90
#2 Alliant Techsystems OICW
#3 H&K; G11
#4 H&K; MP-5
#5 H&K; PDW
#6 H&K; PSG-1
#7 Steyr AMR
#8 H&K; SOCOM
#9 Desert Eagle
#10 M4A1 w/M203 Grenade Launcher

Nice to see my top result hasn’t changed in the last few years. Everything else has but I’m still a P90. Here’s the wikipedia entry.

Problem is that there wasn’t a question asking “are you sleek and sexy?”

Wheel Of Fish!

You’re so STUUUUPIIIIID!

Currently on dial-up, which sucks like chunky goat vomit through a twisty straw. Blame BT.

But in the meantime, having discovered the frame capture function on the DVD software on this machine, I have some new avatars to play with.

Wait until I get onto UHF.

Stop groaning, Munky!

This blog and all others may well be silent for a while as Frood and I are in the middle of moving house. Until we get broadband at the new place all internetty forms of communication will be taking a hiatus from their usual connectivity.

So don’t worry if you don’t hear from me for a few days. While my lack of internet access does not preclude the possibilities that either I’m not speaking to you or something horrendous involving agricultural machinery has happened, neither of these is the more likely explanation for any protracted silence. It’s probably just that I can’t get to my email very readily.

Skype, YIM, Jabber, AIM and MSN are all affected, natch, and I should be considered offline until further notice. I will try to get to my mail when I can.

If you have something you feel you really need me to address, stick “priority tag” in the subject line of the email and make sure it’s from an address I recognise. Don’t feel bad about doing this — it means I’ll at least make the effort to read it rather than sticking it in the To-Do folder. If I disagree with its urgency I’ll let you know.

Just like everyone else in Gimpland. Whichmakes the Unique-Ordinary score something of a misnomer. Or entirely apt.

The Black Queen You scored 4 Power-Finesse, 3 Leader-Follower, 2 Unique-Ordinary, and 2 Offense-Defense!

You are devoted to the cause, and you protect the interests of the Black team. You will often be working behind the scenes, protecting even the lowliest pawn. However, you are impossible to ignore, since at any moment you could strike like the black widow. It is more in your nature to allow your opponent to make a foolish mistake that you exploit, than it is for you to try and force an aggressive victory for your team.

• It’s so Easy – Hawkwind
• Pompeii Am Gotterdammerung – The Flaming Lips
• Dead Souls – Nine Inch Nails
• Don’t Get Lost In Heaven – Gorillaz
• Strangers – Portishead
• Roads – Portishead
• 2:1 – Elastica
• The Order of Death – Public Image Ltd
• Converting Vegetarians – Infected Mushroom
• Stabat Mater – Rossini
• Page One – Lemonjelly
• Angel – Massive Attack
• Teardrop – Massive Attack
• Road Trip – Steriogram
• Mosquito Song – Queens of the Stone Age
• Burn – The Cure
• Good Morning – The Dandy Warhols
• Terminal Annex – Harvey Danger
• Damager 02, Access, Cowgirl, Prayer for God – Scott Mac, DJ Misjah & DJ Tim, Underworld, Darren Tate

I so want one. I want one now. Now. NOW DAMMIT! Where can I buy one? Dammit all to hell, why can’t I find a shop selling one?

This one courtesy of Frood.

• Shatter – Feeder
• Love Is The New Feel Awful – The Dandy Warhols
• Everyone Is Totally Insane – The Dandy Warhols
• Bohemian Like You – The Dandy Warhols
• The Lost Art of Keeping A Secret – Queens Of The Stone Age
• Times Like These – Foo Fighters
• Laura – Scissor Sisters
• Evil Twin – Alienbreed
• Dirge – Death In Vegas
• The Private Psychedelic Reel – The Chemical Brothers
• Lesson No. 1 – Viva Voce
• The Pageant of the Bizarre – Zero 7
• Sad Sweetheart Of The Rodeo – Harvey Danger
• Why I’m Lonely – Harvey Danger
• Stripsearch – Faith No More

You have any of those? The ones you listen to when everything is going to shit and you’re not sure you can cope and somehow just the sound of it gives you that extra millimetre of fingernail to use to cling on to whatever sorry fucking handhold you’ve managed to find? The ones you can put on repeat without getting bored of it because somehow, somehow it’s suddenly like wearing a safety harness and discovering a belay and just for those few minutes you feel, if not that you can climb back up, that at least you can take a breather and you’re not going to fall right there and then?

Right now this is mine.

Everyone Is Totally Insane – The Dandy Warhols
Odditorium or Warlords Of Mars (2005)

Hear me out, for I was joyful once
Like everyone
Hear me out, I must have changed
Sometime and all at once
Cos it seems
That nothing stays the same as certainly as me
And nothing stays the same but me

Well I have toiled and I have tamed
Constricted and constrained
Just to learn about how everyone is sane
When I am old and I am lame
And ruthlessly estranged
Ask me then what I have gained from almost everyone, oh-oh

Hear me out, for I have everything indeed
Hear me out, I must have changed

Well I have toiled and I have tamed
Constricted and constrained
Just to learn about how everyone is totally insane, now
When I am old and I am lame
And ruthlessly estranged
Ask me then what I have gained from almost everyone, oh-oh

Hear me out, for I was joyful once
Like everyone
Hear me out, I must have changed