Are there any Spanish speakers in the audience who could give me a colloquial translation of the word “orsai”? I’ve seen it used as a suggestion for a Spanish translation of the football term “offside”, but the Google translation engine isn’t providing any suggestions.

I’m off to get my hair cut professionally for the first time in 8 years and coloured professionally for the first time ever.

I’m hoping it’ll turn out okay, as although I don’t mind chopping it all off and starting again it has taken me a year to grow it out this far and I’d rather not.

When I get back I’ll tell you about the shit-hot fetishwear I bought last week. Just don’t tell my Mum!

Gimme gimme gimme gimme!

I WANT!

I WANT IT NOW!

Shades, swords, leather, pithy one-liners?

You bet your ass.

You scored as Blade. Thats right you are the booty kicking you cross me and I will stomp a mudhole in your butt type. Sexy and a great fighter with mad fighting skills Blade 100% Dracula 75% Deacon Frost 67% Akasha 67% Armand 58% Spike 50% Lestat 42% Angel 33% Marius 17% Louis 17%

Whose your Vampire personality? (images)
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Broadband is up and running.

Yay!

I have managed some soft-boiled eggs and soft toast soldiers for brekkie and later I shall venture forth for the first time since Tuesday to see if I can find some soup inna tin.

It’s nothing more serious than what would be called “man-flu” in a bloke, but it’s pissing me off. I HATE being ill. It’s stupid and pointless and means you can’t do anything. I’m stuck at home and can’t even get on with the unpacking because my brain’s not working and I can’t lift boxes.

And this is so not a good time to be falling behind on my training.

Did I mention I bought high heels?

Especially for Munky, who worships at the same mocha altar as me. I just invented this. Gods it’s good. Inspired by the spiced chocolate recipe at Bean Scene.

Take enough milk to fill the cup of your choice on top of a double espresso.

Add about an eighth of a teaspoon of dried chilli flakes, quarter of a cinnamon stick, 2 drops of best vanilla essence and some grated nutmeg. Retrieve your milk frother from the back of the cupboard.

While warming through the milk on the stove add 2tsp of Green & Blacks drinking chocolate and one of G&B; cocoa (optionally add 1tsp of that cocoa syrup) to the chosen mug. Make a double espresso.

Mix the chocolate to a paste with a little of the espresso and then add the rest of the coffee. Take hot milk and strain into the milk frother. Froth. Pour on top of chocolatey espresso and stir to mix. Sprinkle with powdered cinnamon.

And I have an incredibly sore throat.

Where’s my lolly?

I have just entered for the Embra Bike New Year’s Day Triathlon.

This is your fault, Munky. If I keel over and die I’m having a note put on my gravestone.

Here lies Sam. A perfectly sensible person who was killed by Munky’s stupid idea to enter a triathlon.

It’s not like I have any triathlon buddies to go training with either. I’m going to have to do this all by myself.

No change there then.

In honour of the departed summer.

I have my first lurgy in a year and it is dreich today, so I am sat at home wearing a woolly hat and two jumpers with nothing better to do than make stupid avatars.

I might have a bath. Steam sometimes helps.