People buy this sort of thing?
Apr.13, 2006, filed under Miscellany
Just as we did down south, the office here has visiting book clubs. So, apparently randomly, you’ll come in and there’ll be a box full of cookery books and starter yoga kits and plush teddy bear backpacks and books You Will Not Find In The Shops, all at knock-down prices. I bought a Sophie Grigson cookbook a couple of weeks ago. Occasionally you will find something worth shelling out a few quid for.
Today I found, in the latest box, a copy of God and me – 365 daily devotions. Apparently it was the Children’s Book of the year 2005, although the sticker doesn’t specify who voted for it.
The book is aimed at 3+ year olds, according to the back. I don’t have anything in particular against Christianity as opposed to any other dogmatic religion (i.e. I hate dogma of any form), and if parents want to introduce their kids to their faith that’s fair enough.
But this is hilarious as well as mildly disturbing. Some examples:
January 6 – Dear God, I’m sorry for the naughty things I’ve done today. Thank you for forgiving me. You’re great! Amen.
God welcomes us and forgives us just like the father in Jesus’ story. Read Luke 15:11-24January 11 – Hair is a wonderful thing, God! Thank you for my hair. Amen.
The woman in today’s story uses her hair as a towel! Read John 12:1-8January 21Thank you, God, for inviting me to your party in heaven. I really want to come! Amen.
There will be lots of people at God’s party. Where will they all come from? Read Luke 13: 29-30 to find out.April 27 – Dear God, help me to listen carefully to you and think hard about what you want me to do every day. Amen.
The two women in today’s story are both busy. Which one is busy listening to Jesus? Read Luke 10:38-42August 12 – Wow! You are awesome, Lord God! I am glad that you are in control of the world. Amen.
God knows all about the world he has made. See Job 38:16-41November 4 – Dear Jesus, thank you for the Bible that tells us what you want us to do. Please help me to do what you say. Amen.
Jesus tells a story about building. You can find it in Luke 6:46-49
I think it’s safe to say that we’re not talking about the Gnostic tradition here.
I don’t know about you, but I find this degree of indoctrination faintly alarming. It’s one thing to explain to children of that age what your beliefs are, but this is more than that. This is like brainwashing. There are devotionals in there about asking God for help turning off the TV if there’s a scary programme on, or asking God for help in remembering to wash your hands.
Is this normal? Or is this another American-style Neo-Con Christian Fundamentalist tentacle worming its way into the generally secular British culture?
I think we need daily devotionals of the sort I would want if I were in charge:
January 1 – Dear Auntie Sam, how I wish I hadn’t had quite so much to drink while celebrating last night. Please help me get rid of this hangover.
Auntie Sam says that if you are going to drink so much at Hogmanay, you should expect to feel poorly sick in the morning.February 2 – Hair is a wonderful thing, Auntie Sam! But it gets in the way!
Auntie Sam says that clippers are the way to go.March 21Thank you, Auntie Sam, for inviting me to your party. I really want to come!
Auntie Sam says: fab. Bring booze.May – Dear Auntie Sam, help me to understand how scary it is that most people are fuckspuds with so few braincells an ant could get lost inside their heads, and most of them have driving licences.
Auntie Sam says: try riding a bicycle round a major conurbation in the rush hour.August 12 – Wow! You are fantastic, Auntie Sam! I am glad that you are in control of the world.
I always said I’d make a great job of it, although I really can’t be arsed. I’m just pretending to control the world, but don’t tell anyone.November 4 – Dear Frood, please help me to understand on those odd occasions when I really don’t get what Auntie Sam is telling me no matter how hard she tries to explain because after a while she gets really grumpy and that’s not nice.
Frood tells a story about ants. See here
There. That’s much better.
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Singularity
~something that is singular as (a) a separate unit, or (b) unusual or distinctive manner or behavior; PECULIARITY;
~the quality or state of being singular;
~a point at which the derivative of a given function of a complex variable does not exist but every neighborhood of which contains points for which the derivative exists;
~a point or region of infinite mass density at which space and time are infinitely distorted by gravitational forces and which is held to be the final state of matter falling into a black hole. Sight
